8/15/14

30 Day Self-Esteem Challenge!: Part 1

Hello my angels!

I know I haven't been posting researched articles recently, and I do apologize for that, but my internship just ended, so expect some more to come:)

However, to keep you from going cray without moi, here are 30 days worth of self-esteem challenges, inspired by this awesome Tumblr!

Day 1: I want you to go one day without doing your hair. No heat, no styling, just your old natural fluffy awesomeness flowing in the wind.

Day 2: I want you to go without makeup today. Now I know this is hard for some boys and girls who struggle with cystic acne like I do, but this is a great exercise in confidence. And no cheating: you must at least leave the house once, even if only to get the mail.

Day 3: Opposite of yesterday's demure; I want you to go bold! Whether you're rocking a red lip, or sporting leopard pants, you want heads to turn. Feeling confident despite stranger's glares is about holding your head high, smiling, and strutting down the street like there's no tommorow.

Day 4: Treat yourself to some dark chocolate today, it's been a hard few days of self-esteem work. Learn to take care of your mind and body by treating as a temple, and sometimes said temple needs some chocolate.

Day 5: Take an ugly selfie. Not "cute ugly", no, downright hideous. Post it to your instagram, and let go of the idea that you must look good at all times.

Day 6: Wear an outfit in which you don't necessarily feel confident. Figure out what it is about the garment that doesn't tickle your fancy. Shape, fabric, color? This will help you shop with a body positive eye next time you head to the mall.

Day 7: To help you get over the low self-esteem of yesterday's outfit, slip on our go-to self-esteem boosting get up. Again, look out for specific features that help you love yourself that much more. Write them down in your phone and be on the lookout for those features next time you step into an overwhelming Forever 21.

Day 8: Be creative with your style. Try thicker eyebrows, or a grungier getup; playing around with self-expression helps you to know who you are and aren't. After all, how can you love yourself if you don't know who you even are?

Day 9: Give somebody a compliment. A simple "nice skirt" can make someone's day, and you can feel good about being a nicer person today than you were the day before.

Day 10: Take care of yourself today. Give yourself a foot massage, slip on your most comfortable sweatpants, watch Friends all day (I'm going to pretend I don't do these things all day err day). Again, body=temple, and temple needs some lovin'.

xoxo

Gabby

8/14/14

Explaining Tattoos/Piercings to Kids (and Adults)

Hello all!

I recently got a new tattoo, and this one is quite visible (don't worry moms, it's on my upper thigh, still not ruining my life and career), so I've gotten a few questions from my young cousins and nephews. I also have a few piercings, so let me tell you, kids aren't shy about pulling and pointing. 

How can we blame them! Permanent skin drawings? Metal going through the skin? Why get those? Here are a few things to keep in mind when speaking to children (let's be real, adults too) about tattoos and piercings:
(Tattoos and piercings are a deeply body positive endeavour (more on that in a next post), so their understanding is crucial to me! )

1. No pointing please.
Modified folk deserve respect, and pointing, tugging, touching without permission is considered very rude. It's simply decoration. No one points at your aunt Lisa for wearing a bracelet, so why point out at aunt Gabby for wearing her nose ring? 

2. Tattoos are forever.
Yes, they look cool on uncle Jerry, but don't run out and get the silliest thing you saw in a magazine as soon as you turn 18. Tattoos are permanent, so think about the design you want for quite some time before pulling the tattoo trigger.When do you know you're old enough? When you'll spend the proper money to get it done in a proper shop, not a back alley. When you'll take care of the healing and recovery of the modification. That's called maturity, and some never get there. 

3. Self-Expression.
People who choose to stretch their ears, or push metal through their skin chose to do so as a form of self-expression. Just like dressing a certain way, cutting your hair in a certain style, it's a decision that only reflects aesthetic preferences. It doesn't make them a bad parent, friend, partner,person (note to all employers), so they deserve to be treated with respect. I don't judge others for choosing to not have tattoos, so the respect should be reciprocal. 

Hopefully this helps next time you see a modified person on the street with your child friend.
Have an awesome day

8/13/14

200

Hello my sweet angel fudgies,

Today I am posting my 200th article for the blog.
200.
Two hundred.
Dos ciento.
Deux cent.
Those are all I the languages I speak.

I am beyond grateful for the love you have given me, so here's a cute, dorky poem I wrote for you.

Once upon a time there was a girl.
She had gone through hell, she had been at her worse.
She wanted to love the body she so hated.
Hence on a February night, this blog was created.

At first, the stats were dead, no one read,
Except the occasional Russian spammer and her friends.
But through the help of Twitter, Youtube, and Tumblr too
Her posts got better, and her audience grew, grew, grew.

Now she has an audience bigger than she could have imagined
And the love she receives is more than her imagination could have fashioned
To think this was all started from a 16 year old, horrendously bored
My angels, my fudgies, my sweets, here's to 200 more.

8/8/14

10 Reasons This Tweet Makes Me Sigh

Ohhh, Kalel, with your 90 pound body and your judging glare.
Here are 10 reasons this tweet makes me sigh:

10. I don't see no badge on your extra small clothes that says "body police" 

9. Many people who suffer from being overweight struggle with an emotional addiction to food. Perhaps you'd prefer they drown their sorrows in heroin, after all they'd be thinner. 

8. Maybe you don't "understand that shit", but the good thing is, you don't have to! Not yo body, not yo problem. 

7. My biggest pet peeve in the world is others going around judging what others are eating/drinking/putting in their bodies. Comments like this make me paranoid when I have to buy soup at the supermarket like..."is there someone out there glaring at me?"

6. No but seriously, where's your body police badge?

5. There are many conditions that can lead a person to a size that's bigger than a 2. Hyperthyroidism, cushing's syndrome, depression, etc. Can't see inside a person's body? Can't judge their health.

4. The #America comment is just plain wrong, for obesity is an international concern, especially in North America, but also in every other part of the world. Unhealthy foods are usually cheaper, hence not a single socio-economic class is untouched by the risk of obesity. 

3. Maybe this man was carrying a Big Gulp of water, or a protein shake. Maybe he's trying to lose weight, or already has lost a ton! But the thing is, you don't know, and you probably don't care to. All he is to you is just a fat person. 

2. Judging someone's character based on their weight is a prominent disease in this day and age. "You don't understand that shit...it's like signing your own death certificate..." Might as well call him dumb, or suicidal, or lazy. But you know nothing about this poor person, trying to get on with their day. 

1. Where, the fuck, is your body police badge.

Rant over.
xoxo

Gabby



7/30/14

You Are Not Your Number (SAT And Scale)

Hello my beautiful princesses,

Millions of American students this year will take the Scholastic Assessment Test, commonly known as the SATs, which means that this year, millions of students will feel stupid.

Oh, don't feel bad, SATs, I know you're just trying to help colleges make the right decision, but your rigid numbers, evaluating what a group of people decided was "intelligence", scare the living fudge out of this generation, moi included.

I recently got my test scores back from a May assessment. Nothing bad, just nothing great, at least according to the nuisance of a perfectionist brain I have been cursed with. It made me think of the inflexibility of numbers, their inability to compromise and show diversity, which reminded me of a similar tool humans use to assess their characteristics in comparison to others.

Can you guess what that is? (it's in the title, by the way. 800 on critical reading for you, glen coco!)

weight scales. 

The parallels are really quite frightening, considering the magnitude of both these assessments in the average American life.
-both are construed of numbers, simply numbers.
-both are inevitable comparison enablers.
-both are widespread.
-both, in the grand scheme of life, mean nothing.

Here's what I understand to be true about these numbers.
If you are obsessed with your bathroom scale, or that darned Superscore, listen up. This is important:

Just like the number on a weight scale cannot tell you everything about your health, your SAT score doesn't give you the whole picture on your intelligence.  Here's why.

1. Numbers are fickle. Sorry mrs. Morin, 11th grade math teacher, it's true. If you were to weigh Dwayne Johnson, the scale would probably break. And his BMI? forget about it! Characterized as obese right away, even though that man could probably lift the island of Manhattan with one bicep.

Same goes for your intelligence. Maybe math is not your thing, but you are a fantastic listener, showing deep emotional intelligence. Maybe you are amazing at sketching, demonstrating a great depth perception and artistic intelligence. The SATs cannot possibly know that, so it's important that you do:)

2. Comparison Schmoparison. It's easy to compare numbers, but at the end of the day, it's simply illogical. I once knew a girl, very petite, only measured 4 foot 9, and weighed 95 pounds. OF COURSE she weighed 95 pounds, she was miniscule. I'm almost a foot taller, I could cut off both my legs and still not weigh 95 pounds! Comparison is futile.

As previously mentioned, different types of intelligence cannot be measured by the SATs. Maybe the girl in your trig class got a 2350, but can she write/draw/dance/sing/be a good friend like you? I think not.

3. There are many diseases in life that are both terrible and widespread. Homophobia? Still a big thing. Malaria? Still hugely widespread. BMI? Still being used, even though mother Science has proven it to be completely inaccurate. Just because everyone and their grandma takes the SAT, doesn't mean it's good. Don't misunderstand me, definitively take it, but don't take its results personally. 

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These tests are there because they help us understand ourselves a bit better, in easy-to-define terms, but they should never define us.
You are worth so much more than your score. 
(hihi that rhymes, enter the poetry contest here)

xoxo

Gabby

7/29/14

4 Videos Girls Must Watch

Hello ma angels:)
crossposted from bbbsblog.wordpress.com
Tired of watching the Kardashians all summer? Need something more intellectually stimulating for you or your young girl? Here are 5 important videos to watch as a female!
4. Always #LikeAGirl
This video went viral last month, and there's a good reason why. We teach girls through our hurtful words that being a girl is weak, or inferior to being a boy. Girls grow up to believe they are meant to be beautiful, and that's all they can be, not strong, or smart, or athletic. Watch this with your youngster and let the message bounce around her head:)
5. Pantene Labels
Ahhh, the unquestionable double standards. This video really strikes home for me, for whenever I have taken on a leadership role in my life, the men around me called me bossy, instead of organized, or a leader. Help your young friend realize the double standards of this world by watching this video, so that she can understand why it's okay to be bossy sometimes. 
2. Try, by Colbie Caillat
I love this song! The song itself is good enough for me, but the message behind it brings it up a couple notches! For a mainstream artist to come out with such a simple yet powerful video is quite admirable. Blast this on your way to school or summer camp, and let the words skin in:)
1. Dove Unstoppable

When I was in the 5th grade, I quit swimming lessons because I didn't like the way my body looks in a bathing suit. And still to this day I loathe going to the beach for those same reasons. Girls need to understand that beauty is not all that you can be, and that insecurities should never stop you 
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xoxo
Gabby